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Sherry Davey here, your fellow mommy and personal, professional stand up comedian. Sit back, grab a cup of coffee ‘cause this is going to be a good one. Now I need to confess something to you. I have a friend whose child is so spoiled and behaves so badly that I’m now actively avoiding her. I’ve tried subtle and not so subtle hints like, “Bring over the movie you made on your last trip….the Omen.”

She’s a good friend and a great gal, someone who’s company I always enjoy. I used to look forward to our play dates now I dread them. I think Lily does too. She actually said yesterday, “When Ethan comes over can I just go to bed?” Now, being the sleep deprived mommy that I am, I actually said yes. I also don’t believe in subjecting my child to other poorly behaved children. Also, kids always seem to pick up the worst habits from each other. No one ever says, “You know, since hanging around with Billy, Michael is getting better at math and says thank you all the time.”

So, I put Lily in bed with a mini DVD player, set the volume on low and closed the door. When they arrived I told them my mother came and took her for an unexpected trip to the park.. Much to my chagrin, within the hour she came downstairs. I guess she was stirred by Ethan’s screaming and whining and the sound of his fists hitting his mother’s back. He’s a lovely child.

I used the occasion to politely, but bluntly (what could I do I was caught) council her on why all our friends won’t speak to her anymore nor invite Ethan to birthday parties. But it just didn’t sink in. She and her husband are convinced that he’s a special sort of genius child and that other children just have trouble relating to him because of his ‘supreme intelligence’. She actually used that term, ‘supreme intelligence’ sounds like some sort of government conspiracy to me. “Really?” I replied. “I didn’t know that throwing up to get your own way is a sign of genius?”

I’m at the end of my tether. We’re never able to get together without the kids so it’s the two of them or nothing – deal or no deal. It’s only mid-summer but I think I’m going to be weeding ye olde friendship garden very soon. Let’s not have a play date let’s have a conference call instead!

July 22, 2006 at 07:28pm | Permalink | Comments (131)

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